Comfort In Being A Fossil

Amanda Falcon

Comfort In Being A Fossil, Digital illustration

Interview by L. Valena
January 19, 2024

Can you start by describing the prompt that you responded to?

I was given a poem which had a lot to do with the love of a sibling, specifically a sister. Although I don't have a sister, I do have a brother, so I could really understand the feelings. I also focused on the line that says, "There is comfort in becoming a fossil." I could relate to that strongly. There was so much imagery, especially the idea of unfurling. I started thinking about ferns unfurling. And snails. There were so many ways I wanted to approach it, but the image of a fossil, particularly an ammonite, stuck with me. I just pictured myself curling up, and staying in that feeling.

Where did you go from there? How did you decide how to move forward?

I started playing with some ideas. At first I wanted to do three drawings: one of a fossil, then curled up, and then uncurled. That was a bit ambitious, though. There were different ways I wanted to show the movement, but then I decided to stay with the stillness of the fossil. I wanted to do some color, but I just didn't have time. I kept thinking of the ferns.

I started by doing some sketches digitally and in my sketchbook. I think doing it in Procreate delivered what I wanted to do best. I was considering using the sketchbook just because of the texture of the paper, but I was able to add that in digitally.

Did you do this piece entirely digitally?

I did the outlines on paper, in pencil, and then took a picture and traced it digitally so I could get different textures of pens. I wanted to emphasize the texture of the paper, so I used different brushes to get that texture. The color as well. That's something I couldn't get in the actual sketchbook.

Do you think of this as a self-portrait?

I definitely see myself as being that person, curled up. As I said, I've had some similar feelings about my brother, so I was able to picture myself in the poem. That line, "There is comfort in becoming a fossil" – there are so many things you could apply it to, especially with career stuff. In between high school and university, I took at least four gap years. So this resonated with me. The comfort of being in your zone, and not wanting to get out. I definitely saw myself in the poem. But like the poem says, once you start uncurling, everything lines up.

It seems like such a crucial part of the human experience, to get comfortable in a situation, even if it's really unhealthy for us. And then we have to unfurl and it's so painful.

I agree with the unhealthy part! It's the uncertainty; you don't know what's out there. I'm from Puerto Rico originally. That's where I was born, and then we made a huge move to the US. Then I made another major move to the UK, by myself. That was definitely going out there not knowing what would happen, but it was so rewarding to make that jump, recognizing the potential that I had. No matter what life threw at me, I was able to get through it. There are so many different ways to interpret this poem, especially the sister part. There are different aspects of life it could refer to.

You could apply it to all sorts of things, but sibling relationships are complicated, aren't they?

Yeah. I'm the oldest sibling, so leaving home for the first time and leaving your younger sibling behind – there’s a huge disconnection there. That's something I could relate to, especially with my brother, because I was his protector. Now there's that distance, not only geographically, but also an emotional block between us.

It's a new year, and a powerful time to think about unfurling and growth. Are there any aspects of your life that you're particularly thinking about related to that?

Honestly, art is one of the main things. I used to do so much art, but then just got into a block. When you start self-criticizing yourself so much, it becomes a thought pattern. If you think it's not good, no matter what people tell you, you don't think it's good. You just see all the imperfections. So slowly I started to try some new things. I got an ipad, so I could do digital art. That is getting me back into creating every day, and finding joy in creating again. My art teacher, who also participated in Bait/Switch, has been kind of coaching me. He's the one who recommended I do this. He told me to get a sketchbook, and to get back in the habit of creating every day.

Career is the other aspect of life that I'm focused on. I'm graduating from university this year, and I want to work in museums behind the scenes. I've been thinking about how to make connections, and how to get there. It's a rocky road, but we'll see how it goes.

It's complicated, right?

Yes. Life is not meant to be easy, that's for sure. But that's the fun of it. Everyone goes through so many different experiences, and develops such different perspectives. There are so many ways we can go about it. In that same way, everyone is going to think of something different when they look at this drawing. What is the fossil that each of us is stuck in?

Is there anything we haven't talked about yet, that you want to talk about?

I used to be a much more traditional artist, because digital felt almost like cheating. But then I realized when I started that it's the same thing as using a pencil. You're still getting the idea out there. As an artist, you definitely have to try different tools like that. If digital doesn't work, try oil painting. I've been trying out painting with acrylics, and also embroidery. Different ways of getting ideas out there.

Do you have any advice for another artist approaching this project for the first time?

Try getting other perspectives. Analyze the prompt yourself, but then also show it to two or three other people and ask them what they think. That just adds more images in your head. Of the three people I showed the poem to, one talked about ferns, another one talked about being curled up, and the other one talked about specific lines in the poem. Getting different perspectives helps.

Call Number: M87PP | M89VA.faCo

Amanda Falcon Ramirez, a Puerto Rican artist in the UK, is close to graduating in Art History and Classical Studies. Inspired by nature's beauty, her creations reflect both academic exploration and a personal journey towards self-kindness.